The Beauty of a Submissive Wife

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Have you ever wished to be a submissive wife? Have you felt it is difficult to practice rather than preaching? Do you still want to be a submissive wife even if you fail a thousand times, then please join me. The beauty of a submissive wife is far more than comprehended, and it is the wisdom of God to establish families in His love. I don’t think there would be anyone who would like to see a wife who screams at her husband. And what would be the feeling if you see a family where husband and wife care for each other? Which one do you prefer? Even though we love to be the wife having the divine responsibility of taking care of the families, we often fail and muddle. How can we overcome this? How can we be the wives God desires us to be?

Let me tell my story and How I overcome my rebellion nature to the authority God has put over me… I am confessing here to help other women who think they failed and can’t move anymore. I married to a God-fearing man, and when we started staying together, it was not always smooth. We both loved God, but I found myself struggling to be a submissive wife. When I think back, I am surprised to realize that, during those days, I have even searched the internet to know “How to be a submissive wife?”. I found it difficult and hard to understand. In this world of feminism, equal rights and so many things-being submissive is an out of the box concept and sad to say; I also felt the same way.

As days went on, I realized I am taking away the happiness of my family. I never wished our family life to be something without true love or something which is done out of compromises or adjustments. I wanted the essence of love in our family life, centered in God. And that was the decision, to rebuilt the family in the love of God.

I knelt on the floor, cried unto the Lord to help me in my struggle to obey His word. That day, I decided to take a voluntary step to be submissive to my husband in everything. I took that step for the Lord, as His word says in Ephesians 5:22, “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord”. How can I say that I will obey the Lord if I can’t submit to the authority He placed over me? It was difficult at first. During those days, I would express my frustration to God alone when a situation arises to argue.  It changed the circumstances, It changed my nature and ultimately, it changed our family life. Submission became easier than it was never before.

How does that happen? Is it because I hid all the bitter feelings within me to be a submissive wife? No, not at all. We all can learn true submission from Jesus. “Christ Jesus: who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God: but made Himself of no reputation, and took upon Him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men: and being found in fashion as a man, He humbled Himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross”(Philippians 2:5-8). He set the perfect example for us. And He can understand us. What do we have to do? We have to cast our cares and worries on Him alone. As He did, submit to the perfect will of the father in our lives.

As wives and mothers, we are confided the divine responsibility of building up Godly homes, raising Godly Children. A wise woman builds her home and how can be someone wise? What do the word of God says concerning wisdom? James 1:5 says God gives wisdom generously to those who ask Him.

When I failed miserably and sought the Lord for help, He taught me things in a new light. It was a step by step process. He showed me a Christian family, I mean an Ideal Christian family where love and submission walk side by side. Then He revealed the scriptures for me. Everything was fresh and new and that is the way of the Lord. He reveals His secrets and His will to those who earnestly seek.

Submission is far easier if you have an ideal husband, what if you have a difficult husband who is hard to understand and deal with. What if he takes you granted for everything and ignores your feelings? This is really hard to answer. But if you believe, there is hope. If you really want to have a lasting marriage, I plead you to take an extra mile with Jesus who can change your life. There is hope in Jesus and He loves you so much. Please don’t give up. Give your heart, the rejections, pain, and agony to Him. He is ready to heal your wounds and transform your life.

And as wives and mothers, my question to you is are you ready to take up the challenge to obey the word of God in your responsibility of life? When we meet Him again He is not going to ask about the career or the money we made. But we will be responsible for our husband, our children, and our household. The word of the Lord is not complicated but we have to give up our desires to do His will.

The choice is yours…

If you are willing, I would like to hear about the decisions you made!!

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  • While God asks us to ‘submit’ to our husbands, he isn’t asking us to ‘be submissive’. Rather he is ask us to do what is against our human nature—put someone else first and respect and support that other person’s opinions and ideas. Men value being respected over being loved. So God is asking us to show our respect for our husband. He then has Paul remind men that they need to love their wives—because that’s the most important thing to women—to be loved. God gave women brains and talents, and he never says we need to ‘be submissive.’ Paul is trying his hep both men and women understand that marriage is a sacred partnership—not a master/servant relationship.

    • Absolutely, it is not a master/servant relationship but indeed its a shadow of Christ and church. A real Man of God would never treat his partner as a slave because she is submissive. That’s why Sarah called Abraham “Adonai” and was obedient to Abraham by trusting God (1 Peter 2:5-6). So, being submissive to your husband is similar to we all being submissive under the authority of God. God treats us as sons and daughters, not as slaves though we call Him Master.
      Thank you for your response…

  • God is so good and can be trusted through the tough times. He asks us to trust Him and submit to our husbands, not trust our husbands and submit to them. At least that is how He taught me. Alot of women struggle to submit because their husbands are out of control and sometimes not even saved yet. It takes trusting the Lord to do as the Lord asks for sure. Blessings to you for your heart and this wonderful post! ❤

  • I recently read that being submissive means being on the same mission. It is not hard for a woman to love when she is loved like Christ and men will make mistakes, but that responsibility is theirs, equal not domineering. Jesus freed women in His ministry.

  • It is so hard to read your words even though I believe every word of it and know it’s the truth. I have tried everything and I still find it so hard to submit. Ever since I was a child I was , well let’s just say strong willed. In reality I was a little bully! At 32 yrs. Old I thought I had grown in grace. I know the concept of my husband’s biblical place in our family but I struggle so much with my own. I feel an anger inside myself sometimes because it is so against my nature. My mother raised me to depend on myself (she was a single mom). She is now a happily married woman who is very much a biblical wife! I am still in the midst of this battle and I feel wrong telling Jesus I want to do his will but I can’t stand his plan for my role as a wife. I respect women who are submissive to their husbands and are happy as such. My prayer is that one day I will be also.

    • Carissa, I hope you will read my reply and sorry for this delay… You are not alone, all of us are battling against our flesh and its desires. What helped me the most was– I really wanted to be a submissive wife and meditated more and more on it. If you really desire God will help you, may be not in a single day but over the course of time. God is gracious and He will strengthen us to do His will in our lives… Submissiveness is your investment to build a Godly home and He will reward your efforts. With Love, Sara.